Isn't this little man the cutest you've ever seen???? (besides the hubby of course)


So, at the request of Kendra, I decided I needed to blog. It's been a while, mainly because I haven't had anything to say. I've been really contemplative lately, but with no conclusions. Don't you hate that? My mind hasn't shut up for several days, but nothing of substance has come of it yet.
Topics/things I have been thinking about in a cyclical motion...

1. Am I a good wife?
2. Do I really have any room left in me to care for the poor or needy, after i am filled with thoughts of my own selfish cares?
3. Why, Oh why are the rich richer and the poor only getting poorer? Why do people who spend money on great things (oversized houses, cars they never drive, over 1000 channels of cable) keep getting more, when people who want to go to community college have to work full time and take classes in the evenings while having to pay for babysitters? Is there an amount of money that we might ever have in the bank, where the next paycheck would not be a literal lifesaver?
(please don't send loving funds, we are not starving :)
4. This Easter was really great. But probably because for the first time, I remember grieving on Friday and Saturday and actually feeling anxious for Sunday to come.
5. I gave up bagels and baked goods from Noah's for lent. I am excited to go to work tomorrow. Hello carbs!- don't worry fellow dieters- i won't indulge, only sample.
6. I got a bike over the weekend and am excited to ride now. I am also contemplating running the 1/2 marathon in Portland in October with my best friend Stephanie.
7. Mike is a funny funny man.
8. I miss being around my family. Especially holiday time because I can only imagine the full house, complete with the Floyd's, good food, and lots of chaos.
9. Will both of us ever wake up one morning and say, yup- it's time for kids!?
10. I miss my nephews. All 4 of them. But the little one, Jack at the top, is from the 'stevenson' blood line. The other three I inherited with marriage- best day ever! Jack is so great people.

So, nothing too exciting. Just some thoughts. Love to you- katie

i'm glad i went
Last night was definitely one of those times when you're glad you followed through on something when you nearly bailed. It had been a pretty long day at work, I had had a late meeting and a spot of car trouble on the way home. Kate and I were running way late for our home group and I still hadn't eaten dinner. Reluctanly, I grabbed a quick bowl of leftover chilli, threw on a pair of jeans and hustled out the door not fifteen minutes after making it in. Even on the way over, I just kept saying in my head, "I could really use a quiet night at home."

When we got to the Leonardo's, we interrupted Ken who was a bit of a guest speaker. He's the pastor of a church called the Bridge that meets at the Meow Meow downtown. I had heard stories about him, but as my friend Chris says quite adequately, "he looks like he could kick my ass in about five seconds," even though he's somewhere in his fifties. He had heard that our home group had been handing out socks and ponchos downtown to the homeless and thought we might be able to get in on what he and his wife have been doing for several years. I had expected a bit of the good 'ole ministry sales pitch, but he just chilled and spoke from his heart, and I think it's safe to say that we were all floored. He refers to those known derogatorily as "street kids" simply as, "my friends downtown," and it's immediately evident that he means it.



In the couple of hours that he hung out with us, he threw out stories about loyalty that were more than a little inspiring along with some pretty sobering realities about life in the cracks of Portland. I think what amazed me most, however, was his willingness to elevate a group of people through service that most would like to ignore. I'll never forget his statement about collecting hoodies and t-shirts for his "friends": "I'll get ten bags of donated clothes and throw nine of them away(or donate them to Goodwill). My friends deserve the very best. They're beautiful people and they deserve the feeling of owning something new and beautiful just like you and me. I won't give them things with holes and stains." Or perhaps even more of a window into his passion: "I usually go home feeling terrible that I have a warm bed to sleep in and I have to leave my good friend on the cold street."

The Portland Mercury had a good article on the Bridge from a while back (thanks to Chris for the reference). Give it a read if you have the time. I think it's curious that the reporter set out to interview some local pastors, most of which refused and said they would sue if he even printed their names in the liberal magazine that also has porn advertisements. Ken ended up being the only pastor featured and was stoked to have the publicity. Perhaps it's just that openness that made the reporter conclude the article with this statement:

Leaving The Bridge, having thoroughly enjoyed my time talking to Ken and Deborah, I start thinking, who knows? Maybe there is a God. How else would you explain an unabashedly pro-church article in a jaded, twentysomething newspaper filled with music reviews and sex ads? I think, yeah, there's a God, and he understands the importance of print media. Even if the messenger is a "filthy" one, He still wants to be well represented. And good representation is a church that not only preaches His message, but embodies it. If there is a God, He understands that as far as churches go, The Bridge is a much better way to get his message across.

After chatting with Ken, I think our home group is going to focus our attention more in the direction that they've been heading for quite some time. He invited us to come have a Sunday afternoon "feast" after church in a few weeks with his "friends from downtown." We're pretty stoked, if not a little nervous. If it's half as community-oriented as he makes it sound, I think it'll be time well-spent.

Had a couple of minutes left on my lunch break and though I would blog. Nothing much to say at the moment. I've been reading more and more about social action as it relates to Christianity on my lunch break (or, perhaps, how Christianity is pretty much all about social action in one perspective or another). We're having Ken from the Bridge come talk with our homegroup tomorrow night about how we can be more effective in our monthly visits with the homeless downtown. He's such a rad guy, I'm getting really excited to meet him for the first time and chat a bit. Almost time to get back to work. That is all for now.

Ugh
I've been vacillating quite a bit this week between a happy/grateful and annoyed/dissatisfied demeanor. Perfect example: I'm in a meeting earlier this week where I hear about different salary advance loans that we're offering and we get off on a tangent about how bad unemployment is in Oregon (something like second in the nation), making me suddenly feel overwhelmingly grateful to have a job, let alone one that pays the bills (barely) and with a company that actually appreciates me. Not five minutes later do I hear someone talking about the new house they're having built and I'm annoyed both with the insane price of real estate and the fact that the salary I was so grateful for five minutes ago just won't cut it in the house-shopping market.

Exhibit B: I hear about an unexpected check on its way simply because a family member decided to share a bonus that they received. As agreed, this little fund is earmarked for fun-spending, not bill-paying. As I comb through the many things on my selfish little list of wants, I'm quickly thwarted by the size of said list, rather than stoked that I get to cross something off of it.

Finally and probably most disturbing: I sit around and complain that I don't have enough time to exercise (which is a lie), that I have this or that minor pain and that I didn't have enough time to hang out with Katie this week...you know, the general pitty party about nothing in particular. Meanwhile, I just learn that my nephew's been in the hospital all week, my sister's been there with him non-stop since Monday and my brother-in-law has been working while having to worry about his sick son and taking care of his other two healthy ones.

I just don't know how to do it. I don't know how to just be thankful, period. And I'm frustrated again.

Figuring life out...

My old college bandmate, Steve, happened to be in town this week. He and his wife, Emily, have just returned to the lower forty-eight from a 6-month stint with YWAM in New Zealand, Australia and Fiji. I'm always inspired by intrepid couples like them. Katie and I used to (and still do) put a high premium on the ability to drop everything and run halfway around the world. There was a short while after we returned from Europe that I started to believe this sort of thing to be over-romanticized and actually a little immature. I started to believe that it takes a lot more guts to stay in one place and live life to the fullest, even while waking up to the same four walls and annoying neighbors day after day. It's easy to jump ship and start somewhere anew every six months, a year, whatever. I'm learning to appreciate the indefinite periods a little more and I think that's where the true ground is gained.

Nevertheless, today's stories and piles of amazing pictures made me realize that this thing called life and its adventures really isn't something to be made light of. It's vitally important to seek out the life-changing and not-so-everyday experiences. Granted, you can't sustain yourself on a diet of exotic locales and unfamiliar people forever, but it would be a bit sad to never get far beyond your backyard every once in a while. And of course there's always the chance that you might impact someone else's life eternally along the way. Kudos to Steve and Emily for stepping up and treating life like an adventure. Good luck reintegrating into the routines and rhythyms or what we call "normal" life. Pick up that fat photo-album from time to time and appreciate all the places you've been and the people you've met. Love you guys.

iPod Karma

So I'm walking up the flight of stairs the other day from our lower-level carport to our apartment. I'm in a bit of a hurry with my bag in my right hand and a phone, a digital camera and my mp3 player in the left. I suddenly feel something slip from my palm and my left hand feels a little lighter. I hear the clatter of something small and electronic hitting the hard cement stair and continuing on until it meets with a solid impact on the concrete below. I look slowly at my left hand, praying that it was either the camera or the phone. Nope. An expletive or two fell out of my mouth and I raced back down the stairwell to find my musical friend lying face-down. I picked it up, looked it over and didn't see too much damage. I clicked it on and waited the few seconds for it to boot up and then the screen appeared...0 albums, 0 songs. NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

17+ gigs of music, gone. It's taken me a few years to compile that collection. I still have a lot of the cd's, but I'll admit that a significant portion was attained by less than completely legal means. You know, you rip a cd or two from a friend here or there and promise yourself you'll buy it if you think it worth the cost. I guess I learned my lesson. I'll try to get a techie friend to recover what was lost, but I have a feeling a large amount of my spendable monthly income will need to go towards a new player and once again fattening up my cd collection. I always wondered if file sharing would end up biting me in the ass someday.

Tahoe Adventure: Parts I and II

It's been far too long. A lot has happened since the last blog-session. As Katie wrote above, we hit the stark white slopes a couple of weeks ago with the awesome Stanley family. We had such a great and relaxing time. Something about Tahoe and laid back, friendly family really make for a nice break from the grind. It had been at least ten years since I'd been back to my family's old stomping grounds and the snow definately made for a memorable reunion. Good times had by all. Most of all, I really enjoyed spending time getting to know more of Katie's family. Great people. I'm really excited to spend more time with them now that we're all out on the left coast.

The following Saturday morning found me, where else, but back in Tahoe. The Stanley's heard of our single-car situation and threw a sweet old Jeep Cherokee our way that had been their winter/summer cruiser up at the lake. I hopped on a plane Saturday morning and drove up the I-5 corridor in what is now Katie's new means of transportation. She's really enjoyed having her own wheels for the first time since we've been married. The quick jaunt up the coast was also a mellow mind-collecting trip for myself. Lots of random photo ops (like the statue of St. Jude that I found across the street from a Denny's in Reno) and other fun stuff that I'll post at one point or another.

That's been the happenings for the last few weeks. We've had a lot of quality time with friends this week. It's been about five months since we left the Lone Star State and we've made friends that we feel like we've known for years. That doesn't happen easily or often and we definately feel blessed. Big thanks to the Leonardo's for the pasta last night and to Tyler and Erin for the authentic Ore-Mex experience tonight.